Memory Monday-It’s a thing…
My mother often tells me I’ll never be too old for her to whip me. I’m sure this used to invoke fear in me at some point in my childhood, but after one rather uneventful day with her and Granny, that phrase only makes me laugh.
The day in question was probably a Saturday or Sunday in 1989. Granny, Mom, and I were having lunch and the three of us were all buzzing around the kitchen doing different things. I’m not sure what Mom kept saying to Granny, but Granny was getting irritated. I sat in my normal spot along the side of the table near the back door. Granny settled into her spot at the head of the table with her back to the hallway. Mom was still across the room, but would end up sitting across from me.
Mom said something else to Granny and Granny said, “One more word out you and I’m going to smack you.”
As Mom pulled out her chair and said something else to Granny. Granny stood up as Mom sat down and Granny’s hand snapped forward and popped Mom right across the cheek. Granny, without missing a beat, walked across the room to the kitchen sink.
Mom’s face was priceless. She sat down, shocked, with her mouth hanging open. I slid out of my chair and crawled up the hallway to my room. My sides hurt from laughing and I tears poured out of my eyes from laughing so hard. I couldn’t even pull myself to the bed. I was still on the floor trying to regain my composure when Mom walked in my room.
“She smacked me.” She said, a surprised look still on her face.
“I know! I saw it!” I howled.
“Well! I just don’t think this is funny.”
“You’re never too old, Mom!”
There is nothing in this world like seeing you mother’s words turned back on her. So now, her threat is an empty, hollow threat that only makes me laugh.